Hello, this is probably just going to be a short, not too sweet with me doing a bit of ranting post. But, on the other hand, it proves that being a parent isn’t all fun and games and happiness and rainbows haha!
Look at this face. Angelic? Butter wouldn’t melt? The best behaved little boy for this polaroid photo? It may seem that way… but underneath it all, Jax is currently, most of the time, the opposite.
I’d say for the last month or so, he’s become really opinionated and ‘no’ is his favourite word. Even when I’m 100% sure he means yes, he’ll still say no. On top of that, whatever Jax says or does, is what he’s doing and there’s no compromise at all. Don’t get me wrong, there are times when I do find it funny and try to keep an open mind, but as these last few weeks have continued, it is actually getting really hard at times (never thought I’d say this). Most things can result in a tantrum; if I take his dummy, if he doesn’t want to walk the way I am, if he doesn’t want to have a nap, if I stop him doing something dangerous or naughty – anything haha!
I feel like I’m finally getting my comeuppance for having the most amazingly behaved baby/child in what seems like the world haha (I’ve spoken to a lot of mummies!) – He never had any problems as a baby; no colic or reflux, took to the breast as soon as he was born and no problems there, he’s always been the best sleeper, best eater, he never cries etc etc. Now he’s the opposite *help me.
For starters, he literally acts like he can’t hear anything I say or ask him – even if I’m right next to him. If he knows he shouldn’t be doing something, he’ll just switch off and carry on. Even if I come down to his level and explain to him why he can’t do what he’s doing, he’ll just look away or go all floppy so he falls on the floor! Boy can that get frustrating (after the 30th time in one day). He’s also, for some reason, gone off most food which he loved 3 weeks ago; toast – won’t touch it, poached eggs he had every day for breakfast and now he’ll only eat half of one, won’t eat sandwiches, won’t eat bananas, the list is endless. I know a lot of people say children only eat the amount they need to but because Jax has been such a brilliant eater his whole life, I’m always worrying he’s really hungry.
Of a night time, Jax has got really clingy and often wakes up sobbing asking to come in my bed and sleep with me. Ole works nights so I do have space but I really don’t want to get into the habit of him sleeping with me, especially after he’s been such a great sleeper in his own bed in his own room (he usually sleeps from 7:30/8pm-8:30/9am). It doesn’t help that he no longer wants a beaker of milk because in the past if he woke up, he’d have some milk and go back to sleep, now I either have to stroke him bent over his cot like Quasimodo or I have to leave him to cry – which I hate. After all of that, he’s been waking up at 6/7am which I’m not used to after 21 months of him not waking up before 8:30am!!
So yeah, right now is quite a testing time haha! Everyone keeps saying “oooh it’s the terrible twos!” – nooooo please no! I think it’s just a bit of a shock to the system because he is genuinely usually the best behaved little boy I could ask for. I am hoping its just a phase haha.
There are times when he’s very loving though and he always just kisses me or gives me a cuddle so that makes up for all his devilish behaviour. It also makes me think ‘maybe this is him going back to his old self’, only for 10 minutes though before the next tantrum haha!
I’ve always said being a mum isn’t as hard as I thought it’d be, but currently it is really hard. All I know is, my love for Jax is endless and no matter how many times he makes me want to scream, cry and pull my hair out – all at the same time – I know that it’s only temporary, and being patient, loving and giving him guidance is the best way to be. Parenting isn’t always going to be fun this is just one of those times, but every kiss, cuddle and laugh we share makes all of it worthwhile.
Jax having a tantrum on holibobs!
Love, J xxx
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